This is this the second in a three-part series.
In Judaism, there are certain prayers that are only said with a group of Jews. There is a value in each person’s presence. A community is necessary for certain prayers and rituals. Even if you don’t know the prayers or can’t even read Hebrew, you can make all the difference at a service. You don’t need to know the tune. You don’t need to be able to read Hebrew. You just need to show up.
Rabbi Tamar Malino recently lead “The Prayers of Our Hearts,” a class on prayer in Conservative and Reform Judaism. In that class, while discussing the purpose of prayer, a number of reasons relating to the community were suggested.
The community can provide emotional support. Mourner’s Kaddish can only be said with a minyan (a group of 10 Jewish adults). Though it varies in some communities, traditionally, only those in mourning stand and recite the prayer. That way, others can see and be reminded of those who may need extra attention.
When we come together in prayer, the individual and the community are strengthened. The individual gets to take part in the service and the community is strengthened by having more people and voices coming together.
Prayer has been referred to as “Both a vertical and horizontal experience.” In joining together in prayer, we’re connected to the Jews in shul with us and G-d above us. In services, we recognize and honor G-d and we feel a sense of belonging to the Jewish people.
The Sh’ma is a central prayer in Judaism. It begins, “Hear, O Israel.” We are talking to Israel, our community. It is recited to the community and with the community. We affirm our belief in one G-d to Him and to and with those around us.
For me, personally, I feel a great pull to support the community because our presence is important. We are at services every Saturday in large part because we feel needed. In our family, there are four of us who are considered adults in Judaism and so, as soon as we walk in the door, we’re already on our way to forming a minyan. Often, our presence makes the difference between whether or not someone can say Kaddish for a loved one.
It was a death that drew me in to services and turned me into a regular and it was hoping to relieve that grief in others that continues to call me back. We only started attending Saturday services regularly to say Kaddish for a friend’s son years ago. In the first year of mourning, we say Kaddish regularly for that person. After that, we say it once every year on the anniversary of the person’s death. During that first year of mourning, there were times I wasn’t able to say Kaddish because there weren’t enough people in services.
In one instance, on a day when I really felt like I needed to recite it, there were only eight adult Jews present. Then a friend walked in followed by his 12-year-old daughter. They made all the difference simply by walking in the door. We were only able to recite the much-needed prayer that morning because they were there. They didn’t have to do anything. They didn’t have to make any grand gesture or lead any part of the service. They only had to show up.
Presence is important in Judaism. You may not be able to read a word of Hebrew. You may have never had a bar or bat mitzvah ceremony. You may feel angry at G-d. You may be a new convert who feels a bit out of place at shul. You may not know the service structure. Regardless of all of that, you are a necessary and cherished part of the Jewish people. You can change the world for your Jewish community simply by showing up.
