On my mind a lot lately has been the concept of idealism. It’s a trait of mine; I realize that. Many people have told me that I seem to have a vision for the way the world “should be.”
I think that is probably the reason why I was able to do something as radical as going vegan when I don’t know a single vegan and have negative responses from my own family for doing so. It’s because I believe in a better world, and I know it has to start with me. Not just for the example of eating plants versus animals, but for the environment, for financial stability, for parenting, for religious dialogue, etc. I have a vision. And recently, many people have been telling me that it’s only going to hurt more when I myself become “aware” of “how the world really is.”
Why do I bring this up? Well, because it matters to me. Being a dreamer is important to me. I’ve always been “the crazy one” in my family, the one who just walks without heeding the direction society is telling him to go. It’s part of who I am.
Do I consider myself a rebel? I don’t know if I’d use that term, but in a way I suppose I am. I don’t see it so much as “fighting society” as “living with my own conscience.” I feel that I need to be a good example for others. To be the one proof to others that it can be done. You can be debt free. You can live without eating meat. And you can forgive. It is possible.
Now I want to alleviate the feelings that might already be rising upon reading this. You’re probably already thinking one of two things: (1) “That’s idealistic; not everyone can do that!” Or, (2) “Well, aren’t you just Mr. Goody Two Shoes!”
To the former, I would say, “Of course it’s idealistic, that is indeed what I’m talking about here.” To the latter, I would say, “I sound a lot fierier on paper. I’ll be the first to tell you that I mess up, and that I don’t always live up to those standards.
I don’t consider myself a hero, and I definitely don’t think I’m better than you. You’d understand why I struggle with self-love if you knew all that I have done, but that is something only God knows. So too with you — I know that I have no right to judge you where you are because I DON’T know. I’m sorry, truly, if I came off to you as someone who has his act together and could “teach you a thing or two.” I know that is B.S. and I call myself out on it before you can get the chance.
So, saying that, what is the point then? Where am I heading with all of this? If the world really is a nasty, irredeemable place, and I fail just as much as you while being such an idealist, how can I remain in that belief? Why don’t I really listen to what those people are trying to tell me?
I want to first say that I did indeed listen to what they were trying to tell me. They have some very valid points. You have to be practical, and you can’t be blind to evil in the world. But I know something they don’t know: Jesus Christ is risen from the dead. The tomb is empty, and all the sin of all the world is banished forever.
The beauty of grace is that it makes life not fair! I could say that line a thousand times. Don’t you see what that means? We are not defined by the limits a corrupt world places on us. People are not only a sum of their past. God makes all things NEW! Even death, the truest of all that is true, has been flipped on its head. That’s what believing in the resurrection means!
I don’t have to be perfect, because GOD is perfect, and he will be my guide! And I can’t give up, not as long as there are people in prison, or who are sick, or suffering with despair, or struggling to make ends meet. When I leave this earth someday, I want my God to know that I flung myself into Jesus’ arms and that I believed it when, if he asked me to bring about his kingdom on earth, he would give me the strength to make that happen.
So I am an idealist, and I’m not ashamed. I am a dreamer. I believe in a vision of a better world. I’ve seen some terrible, terrible things, but I won’t let them drown out all the positive stories I see! Idealism is not ignoring the facts of life, it is looking at ALL the facts — and knowing that God can make all things possible. And after all, there is at least one person who I know can change — me.
David Gosser is a senior in the nursing program at the University of Toledo, a member of Corpus Christi University Parish, and is active in the University’s Catholic Student Association, where he serves as a Religious Committee co-chair. He writes for Toledo Faith & Values.
