I began to see Heaven and Hell as ways to live instead of ways of to die. Heaven was connecting with others and myself in empathy; Hell was disconnecting from my own needs and consequently from others’ needs.
The end of the story is that I escaped my mental jail cell without losing my faith. But it wasn’t immediate or simple. It was a complicated process that involved trauma, unconventional theology classes, and listening to the unexpected, still, small voice of the Holy Spirit.