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Let’s talk – about motherhood

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By Mark Azzara

Dear Friend,

Maclean’s magazine recently posted a really good article about motherhood – and the women who regret it. I want to be clear at the outset. These women love their kids; it’s the job of mothering they hate.

One overarching message is that women don’t believe they have the freedom to say they hate being mothers. Society won’t allow it. Some women who have had the temerity to speak up have even been threatened with harm (sic).

I’ve never thought about “freedom of speech” in such personal terms before. But such freedom is necessary, researchers say, because if mothers can’t speak freely the rest of us can’t understand that role accurately, much less the underlying reasons why moms feel as they do.

Now I’m going to stick my neck wa-a-a-a-a-y out. I’m asking you to read the article and then offer your reactions, either in the comments section below this website article or on the SpokaneFāVS Facebook page.

Just remember that the Maclean’s article isn’t all-encompassing. The moms who are quoted are from the developed Western world. No comparisons are made, or implied, to mothers who live in the Third World, nor to moms who live in developed/developing nations in Asia or elsewhere.

One reason for this suggestion is that I, as a Christian, need to understand God’s intent for individual and family life. I can’t do that apart from possessing a clearer understanding of how 21st Century adults view family.

I believe God wants us to understand one another more clearly. How can I feel compassion for you, forgive you, offer genuine assistance to you, if I don’t know you? And how can I know you if I don’t let you speak? I need to see you as an individual living human being rather than as a stereotyped robot. And this is especially important in an era when, in political terms, we are reducing arguments to “us” versus “them.”

If blogs such as this enable us to engage in healthy conversation, then we can learn from one another, ask questions without (as much) fear and come to a deeper appreciation of truth.

And as the Bible says, “The truth will set you free.”

All God’s blessings – Mark

Mark Azzara
Mark Azzara
Mark Azzara spent 45 years in print journalism, most of them with the Waterbury Republican in Connecticut, where he was a features writer with a special focus on religion at the time of his retirement. He also worked for newspapers in New Haven and Danbury, Conn. At the latter paper, while sports editor, he won a national first-place writing award on college baseball. Azzara also has served as the only admissions recruiter for a small Catholic college in Connecticut and wrote a self-published book on spirituality, "And So Are You." He is active in his church and facilitates two Christian study groups for men. Azzara grew up in southern California, graduating from Cal State Los Angeles. He holds a master's degree from the University of Connecticut.

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