In coming to a crossroad in life, just remember that LIFE IS A RISK! Great risk yields great reward.
I am often very scattered in my thinking. One of my friends refers to my condition as “Attention deficit…ooohh…something shiny!” But rather than consider my behavior a detriment, I choose to try to search for the patterns in life and seek the “authorship” or the guiding hand. There are times when it is easy. But, more often than not, life seems to be disjointed and a rough road.
A few weeks ago, I had an extremely difficult task to complete that was steeped in a multitude of emotions. Mainly, hurt and deep mourning over a relationship that ended prematurely. While these feelings are not unique to me, I did not have a perception that the other person involved was hurt at all. I was solely focused on myself and my own hurt.
Then I received a text message simply stating, “I don’t want you to think I hate you or anything. I am just really hurt by how things ended and the state we’re in right now.” Wow. Perspective. In searching for the author’s story in my own life, I failed to consider the state of another —one for whom I care deeply — or the ways in which our stories overlap.
Now, with new knowledge that both parties were hurt, I am attempting to reconcile and make things work again. While I am hopeful and working to create the foundations that would need to be in place for this to work (finding a job and a place to live), several of my friends have expressed concern that I am sacrificing too much to make it work. But if this is truly the way my story is meant to be written, my sacrifices are only paving the way.
No matter how I choose to proceed, there is risk. I run the risk of my attempts at reconciliation being rejected. And I run the risk of missing out on something great if I do not try. I am at a crossroad. No matter how I choose to proceed, there is risk. Life is a risk. But great risk yields great reward.
So in considering all of those disjointed things that make up my life, I have to at least hope for the best and work toward what I believe to be the best. And, if there is an author to our lives, aren’t these the actions that are required of us? In all our actions, we must consider both our own stories and the stories of those around us. It is when we fail to consider others that we become self-centered and unable to function in relationship or community.
I honestly do not know where my story will take me. I do not know how this chapter will end. But I have to hope for the best and work to create a foundation that will support me. And, in hoping for the best, I have to consider others and work to affirm their stories, too.
