For the last few days, I have said no to at least one request each day.
Reaction 1: Whoo hoo! Saying no on a daily basis may well be my new spiritual practice!
Reaction 2: This is hard. I hate it. I Hate, hate, hate saying no.
I think I have experienced both of those reactions in equal measure over the last few days.
Saying no to some things is not so difficult. (For example, “Would you like to edit my book for free?” is one I’ve never had a problem refusing. Just FYI.)
But I am at a point in my life when most of the offers that come my way are for things that I would have loved to do just a few years ago. I had gotten into the mode of saying yes to those kinds of requests kind of automatically, but I simply cannot anymore. So:
- Last week I refused an endorsement request even though it was for an author I know and feel obliged to help. (I am so, so sorry. You know who you are.)
- On Sunday I turned down a social invitation.
- On Monday I said no to a very interesting editorial project.
- And yesterday I declined to write a new piece for an anthology that sounds like a fascinating project with a top-notch list of contributors. (I also bailed on going to the movies with a friend last night because I had a throbbing headache. She was very understanding, as most people are when I say no, so why is it so hard to say no?)
